Deep Talk

Hey.

Is now the correct time for me to talk about this?

I mean, it can be with your best friend, family, or even somebody else that you think that they're special.

The only reason I'm here to have a "deep" post in here is just because I have no one to talk to. You know (please note the strong Grandpa accent here), there are to type of friends:

• Those who just have fun and don't give a single damn about your life. And
• Those who always try to give advices and are good listeners (note: rare).

And I'm now basically out of reach to both of them, therefore I'm now so clogged up in my room and so tempted to write a blog about this even though some people may think that I'm too young to talk about such topic.

Here I am, I'm sitting in my room typing this with the light scent of berries and American Idol on the TV. Hey.

Well, I have a question for you: Do you talk to your special one(s) often?

(I am secretly feeling like a school counsellor. Just ignore this.)

I mean, I don't. I don't like to bother people that I like the most. :|

JUST KIDDING, I do. From this point, you can see that I'm that annoying girl that always have a deep conversation with her friends at school. Which is not true. Who cares.

I actually don't know how to start this topic so I'm just here mindlessly typing about these stuffs.

I'm not that type of person that always type with a lot of emoji or smiley faces, if I talk with you like so, it's either I really like you or I really hate you (I never really hate somebody in particular, but it just happens at some points of my life), so that it's either I put them meaningfully or I did it sarcastically to you.

WELL, am I doing this correctly or something?

I can't blog properly.

See? Now I'm going out of topic.

Ermmm... Let's see, I'm thinking about flowers. Therefore I'm thinking about my name... or I'm just indirectly thinking about me.

Vain.

Talking about flowers, do you girls keep the flowers that your date gave you?

I don't. In fact, who would give flower to a flower? You don't get it? Okay.

I mean, it's a waste of money. It's not gonna worth when you break up with him/her. It's not gonna worth for a lazy person like me because I'll leave them die because I'm just too lazy to water them. Heh. Sorry. But I accept plushies. They're just SOOO cute. Even if you're my arch enemy, if you give me one, I'll still keep it and take care of it really well. I saw this penguin plushie in Mini Toons one day and I'll probably love you forever if you give me one... not gonna lie.

The word "love" branches into different perspectives; love as a friend, family, lover, crush, whatever you have in your mind. Sooooo yeahhhh.

I'm actually a very ignorant human. I never really bothered to think about smiley faces that people usually gave it to me in their texts... until now. I feel so concerned of myself to be so sad and all when people give less emoji to me. Why Hana. Why. 

And I feel sad when I'm being ignored. This is actually ridiculous for me. I don't even know why. I know everyone feels the same but somehow it impacted me only because of teeny tiny reason that they had. Even when I actually understand them. Hmm.

At least I don't cry over it. It's weird to cry only because of that special someone didn't reply my message for the whole day. Why would people cry over it anyway?

Oh and I can totally relate to the words "so close yet so far" these days on so many things. Such as weekends, fridays, talking with friends online and when taking my stuffs when I'm too lazy to get out of bed. Never thought that being a teenager is this hard. Weird.

I gotta go now... does people even put this kind of outro these days? I'm so lame.

Never mind, I still need to go. Bye!